In the world of Emmerdale, where heartbreak, reinvention, and long-buried secrets often drive the drama, few characters have left as memorable an imprint as Leila Harding.

And now, months after her devastating on-screen death shocked the soap’s dedicated fanbase, actress Roxy Shahidi is reflecting on her time in the Dales—with confessions that

are as emotional as any storyline the ITV soap could script. Sitting down with Express.co.uk, the Emmerdale alum opened up about the deep nostalgia she carries, the unexpected twist

that ended her character’s 16-year journey, and the poignant regret that still lingers as she moves forward into a new chapter of her life and career.

A Farewell That Came Too Soon

Leila Harding’s death was one of last year’s most heartbreaking shocks for Emmerdale viewers. After more than a decade and a half of vibrant, stylish, and often dramatic presence on the show, fans were blindsided when Leila’s storyline came to a tragic conclusion. For Shahidi, the moment she read the script was just as stunning.

“I didn’t have any say in the decision,” she admitted. “The script came as a complete surprise.”

Like many working in long-running television, Shahidi is well aware of the ever-changing landscape of the industry. Budgets shift. Storylines evolve. Characters come and go. But even with that understanding, the end of Leila’s life on screen stirred something deeply emotional.

“Maybe it was just time,” she reflected. “Maybe it was circumstantial. At the end of the day, I’m grateful—truly grateful—for having been on a show like Emmerdale for so long. It’s a privilege to be playful, to bring a character like Leila to life, and to grow with her for 16 years.”

But that gratitude didn’t erase the heartbreak. Nor did it soften the regret that would come later.

A Walk Down Memory Lane — And a Priceless Souvenir

Shahidi appeared recently on Discovery Plus’ Celebrity Yorkshire Auction House, inviting presenter Angus Ashworth into her home to search for overlooked treasures and personal heirlooms. What he found was something that instantly caught viewers’ attention: a commemorative Emmerdale sheep statue gifted to Shahidi for her long tenure on the soap.

It was one item she absolutely refused to part with.

“That statue means the world to me,” she confessed. “It represents years of memories, friendships, and the family that show became for me.”

Yet it turns out the statue wasn’t the only memento she carried from set. Far from it.

“Oh, I took so many of Leila’s six-inch heels!” Shahidi laughed. “I don’t even wear heels—they’re just sitting on a shelf looking pretty. But they’re her. They’re part of who she was.”

Still, amid the laughter and nostalgia, she revealed one regret so significant it still stings months later.

The One Thing She Wishes She Had Taken

After years in Leila’s skin—her bold outfits, daring color choices, and unapologetically fierce fashion—Shahidi now realizes she walked away without something she truly deserved: her character’s wardrobe.

“Actually, I didn’t take as much of her costume as I wish I had—and I really regret that now,” she shared. “At first you think, ‘Oh, I’ll take the whole wardrobe.’ But once you’re standing there, you realize none of it is what you’d wear in real life.”

Still, she took a few items—“some jumpers and a pair of leather pants, because I won’t buy leather since I’m vegan”—but now she often finds herself longing for more of Leila’s iconic pieces.

“I miss dressing up as her,” she admitted softly. “I miss the vibrant colors. Who else wears shoulder pads and neon jackets and absolutely owns it? She died purely for the fashion! Why kill a woman with heels like that?”

It was a joke wrapped in real grief. Fans felt it too.

Shock, Sorrow, and the Landscape of Modern TV

The truth behind Leila’s death lies less in storyline necessity and more in the realities of modern broadcasting. Shahidi explained that everyone in the traditional media space is acutely aware of the shifting terrain: shows tightening budgets, adjusting casts, and evolving their creative directions.

“There’s a shifting landscape, and shows have to adapt,” she said. “Maybe the timing was just right for the character. Maybe it was bigger than any one of us.”

But Shahidi balances that understanding with an emotional honesty rarely heard from actors after major exits.

“I do miss her,” she said. “I miss being part of that family. I miss the daily laughter, the rhythm, the camaraderie. There’s so much I miss.”

Yet leaving didn’t just bring grief—it also brought opportunity.

New Beginnings, New Collaborations

Since her departure, Shahidi has stepped boldly into fresh creative ventures. She revealed she has been working closely with her former Emmerdale co-star Matthew Wolfenden, who portrayed David Metcalfe.

The two have been writing partners for eight years—an unexpected but powerful creative pairing.

“We’ve been writing episodes of Hullraisers and other shows together,” Shahidi said. “We also have a podcast about our midlife crises, which has been so much fun.”

Their collaboration extends beyond writing and podcasting.

“We even have an article in Living North magazine where we walk around Yorkshire exploring mental health and wellbeing. We’d love to bring it all together someday—a walking show about mental health. And right now, we’re pitching ideas. We’re optimistic.”

That optimism—mixed with a touch of self-deprecating humor—is classic Roxy Shahidi. And it reveals an artist who is not just grieving a beloved role, but embracing the thrill of reinvention.

A Legacy That Lives On

For fans, Leila Harding was more than just a character. She was bold, magnetic, flawed, fashionable, compassionate, and sometimes chaotic—everything a good soap icon should be. Her death remains one of the most unforgettable moments in recent Emmerdale history.

And for Shahidi, that legacy is deeply personal.

“I was part of a real family,” she said. “That’s something you don’t forget.”

While her regret about Leila’s wardrobe lingers—and may always linger—her gratitude for her time on the show, and the relationships it gave her, shines even brighter.

With new projects on the horizon, exciting collaborations underway, and an open heart for whatever comes next, Roxy Shahidi enters her post-Emmerdale life with courage and creativity.

But for viewers who watched Leila for 16 years, her absence will always be felt. Her tragic death may have brought her story to an end, but her impact remains—and Shahidi’s heartfelt reflections only deepen her character’s legacy.